Gotta love the medical community!

At the outset, I will apologize for the length of this post, but this is too ridiculous not to share.

There was a message on our answer service this morning. It was one of those canned messages from our pharmacy; apparently there was a prescription refill waiting for "a member of our family." Trouble was, we didn't have any outstanding refill orders. I am in charge of health care and I order all the refills for this household. I called the pharmacy to try to sort out the matter and oh what a delight that call turned out to be! It went something like this (I may paraphrase in places):

BF: "Hello, this is BF. I received one of your canned messages about a prescription refill waiting for somebody here. We don't have any refills waiting. Can that be checked please?"

Clerk: "Yes, certainly." (A few minutes later) "There's nothing here for you. Might it be for another member of the family?"

BF: "Yes, my husband."

Clerk: "Yes, that's who it's for."

BF: "We don't have anything waiting for him either. What is the item please? and from which doctor?" I had a sneaking suspicion that this was a carry-over from the surgery my husband had had a week ago. When I had stopped in to fill the prescription for Percocet, the surgeon hadn't indicated a quantity. When they tried to clarify the order, the doctor was busy in surgery and would have to call back. In frustration, and in the interests of getting him home to bed where he belonged, I told them not to bother. I knew he could take some of my Tylenol #3. He opted instead to alternate between Fast Acting Tylenol and Ibuprofen -- and he managed just fine.

Clerk: "I'm sorry. I can't tell you that."

BF: "So you need to speak to him then?" Over my shoulder, to my husband: "J, pick up the phone please."

Now all three of us are on the telephone.

JF: "Hello, I don't know what prescription you might have for me. I never order any of my refills. My wife takes care of that around here."

BF: "What is the drug please?"

Clerk: "Ma'am, I need for him to ask me that question." (I could not believe what I was hearing!)

BF: "J, will you please ask the lady what the prescription is for."

JF: "What is the drug?"

Clerk: "It's for oxycodone."

JF & BF, in unison: "Oxycodone?" I knew very well there was no such refill waiting for him for that drug but now I knew for sure that this mess stemmed from the surgery a week ago. My husband had no idea what the drug was.

BF: "Who is the prescription from please?" I'm expecting the answer to be the name of the surgeon.

Clerk: "I'm sorry, ma'am, I need for him to ask me that."

JF, this time without my asking him, and sounding quite frustrated with the whole ordeal: "What doctor called that in please?" She named my husband's family physician, and said it was dated 13 April. Now we're really confused! Nothing makes sense. We both insisted that there had to be an error and my husband just hung up the phone. So now the clerk is willing to grant that an error must have occurred somewhere. She asked if I would wait two seconds while she checks the original order (what a novel idea!)

A pharmacist comes to the phone and explains that the prescription stems from a surgery that my husband had but they had to clarify the order ("the surgeon had failed to indicate the quantity," she explained.) She wasn't sure how his family doctor's name got mixed up in this, but if he didn't need it anymore, she could put it back. I assured her that she could put it back. He needed it at the time of the surgery, on April 8th, not now, a full week later. Surprisingly, she didn't say, "Ma'm, I need for him to tell me that."

Now, this is a very small community. Had I walked into the pharmacy, I would have been greeted with, "Hi B. Are you picking up for you or your husband?" and the pharmacist would have dealt with me alone. Not once would I have heard, "I'm sorry, I can't tell you that," or "Ma'am, I need for him to ask me that." Boggles the mind!

But even scarier : surgery on April 8th - prescription not clarified and filled until April 13th - and the pharmacy is reminding us to pick it up two days after that? Wow, I'm sure glad it wasn't for anything really urgent, like to control post-surgical pain!

For those who don't know, my husband had his gall bladder removed as a day surgery patient. To think that what they used to slice you almost in half for can now be done through the belly button is truly amazing! As you have by now figured out, he is well recovered. He is almost back to going up and down the stairs like a gazelle (would that I could match him at that feat!)