Psychological Battering

My massage therapist tells me that I'm too thin.

Isn't that encouraging?

According to Dr. Oz, I am now at precistely the 'perfect' weight for my height.

Perhaps not the perfect weight for a woman of my height given my age.

I mean, after all, I am getting on in years.

You might recall the exchange I had recently with a member of John's skeet club, wherein I discovered that certain persons were obviously of the impression that when I retired four years ago, I had attained the wonderful retirement age of 65 years. I was in fact 56 years old at the time.

One can only imagine the psychological toll that had on me: at 56, I was presumed to be 65 years old?

Earlier this week, I had been explaining to my physiotherapist why I didn't like having to use my cane all the time.

"I find that people treat me differently when I use my cane," I said. "They talk to me as though I'm my grandmother."

"Yes, isn't it funny how that works," she said. "If a peson in her 20s is using a cane, it's assumed that there is an injury or some such thing. But someone our age uses a cane, or walks with difficulty as you do, and it's assumed that they are quite old. ... Hey, you ARE a grandmother!"

"Yes, but I'm not MY grandmother," I retorted, "and that's why I don't like using my cane!"

I was relating this story to my massge therapist, and we were getting quite a giggle out of it, when I was reminded of other "cane-related" incidences.

Almost a year ago, I had gone into my local Bulk Barn to buy some goodies and it just happened to be on a Wednesday. As the cashier rang in my purchases, she informed me that it was seniors' day so I was saving 10%. I didn't question it since she worked there; she should know how these things work. Forever after, my little chickadee would give me her Bulk Barn shopping list since I qualified for the discount, and I would go into my local outlet on a Wednesday and without question, I'd be given the seniors' discount.

More recently, as we entered her local Bulk Barn outlet and my little chickadee was telling me that I could go through the cash for her to get the discount, I noticed the sign that indicated the seniors' discount applied at age 65! I was horrified. We went through the cash, and I was not given the discount. Obviously, since I'm not 65, I didn't push the matter.

The difference between the two outlets? I always use my cane at my outlet because of where it is situtated (it involves a lot more walking). I did not have my cane when I was with my little chickadee at her local outlet. Obviously, the cane makes a difference in how I am perceived by others!

More recently, in fact just two days ago, I was at my local pharmacy. I was questioning the price of a product and asked if it ever came on sale. The clerk, trying to offer me price-saving hints, suggested that I could save an extra 20% by coming in on seniors' day.

"Sure," I thought, "As long as I have ny husband with me to make those purchases for me on that day."

You guessed it. I had my cane with me.

My point here is:  I am six months away from my 60th birthday.

I will not accept that I look like I'm already 65 years old.

But when I use my cane, it is assumed that I am my grandmother.

Not that I am A grandmother; that I am MY grandmother.

And that offends me

It is a battering that my psyche is having great difficulty dealing with lately.

And somehow I'm supposed to get my head around using a walker in my home?