Introducing the new me

Well, my hairdresser rose to the challenge and stopped laughing long enough to come to my rescue.  I think she came up with a resolution to my hair problem.

Works for me.

And it should be easy enough to maintain.

I hope.

The colour is semi-permanent, which means it will gradually wash out so she can see how things progress as my hair grows out more.  She doesn't want me to be a slave to colouring.  I couldn't agree more.

But right now, I absolutely needed to have some colour brought around my face.

Of course, as I look at this photo, I could just start wearing more red!  (That's something I was told a gazillion years ago and did for a brief while too.  Perhaps I'll get back to that.)

OMG I need fixing!

I have no idea what's going on but something needs to be done with my hair.

Where the hell are those curls coming from?

I sent my hairdresser an SOS message earlier this week and included the above photo.

Today she will attempt to do something to save me.

As she put it, "I think a colour would be best for now seeing as you don't need a perm! LOL."

She's really quite cheeky but that's what happens after 30+ years' association.

Perhaps tomorrow I'll post a photo of her creation.

I'm trusting by now she has stopped laughing.

It's Easter

For some of you -- happy hunting, and enjoy that chocolate!

My Dirty Little Secret Revealed

OK, folks, I'm going to reveal my dirty little secret to the world.

Today being Good Friday, I will be observing the day as I have done every year since oh, about 1982, I guess.

That's the year I bought my first VCR.

And one of the first tapes I bought was "Jesus Christ Superstar."  Now of course I own the DVD version of the original production.

Yup, I love that movie.

I even have the CD and play it in my car (I wouldn't dream of subjecting others to my vice, 'cept maybe my little chickadee).

When my little chickadee was a wee thing, she would curl up with me on the sofa and we would sing along to the music.  (She won't admit it, but she knows every song, and she actually likes most of the music too.)  A few years ago she caught it on television (check your guide -- it will be playing somewhere today) and she couldn't believe it when my then-beautiful boy was mesmerized by the scenes and music -- a boy after my own heart!

I've gone to a high school production of it and I've seen the stage production at the National Arts Centre on more than one occasion. The year it came to Ottawa (I believe it was 1992) with two of the performers from the original film (Ted Neely and Carl Anderson) was a most memorable experience -- worth every penny just to see Ted Neeley perform live.

There are very few movies that I'll watch a second time; but I never tire of the music in JC Superstar.

So today, for the umpty-dumpth time, I'll play the DVD.  And I'll enjoy the music again like it was the first time I was hearing it.

"What's the buzz...  Tell me what's happenin'...  What's the buzz...  Tell me what's happenin'..."

Body size and self image

My thoughts of late have been on one's body image.

Probably because of my "obsession" with my weight as I get ever closer to my goal -- a goal that is important only to me.

In my head, it is the norm for me to be very thin.  But as I've discussed here before, apparently I've lived most of my adult life closer to the obese category -- quite unaware of being of that classification, I might add.

My little chickadee told me last week that in her lifetime, this is the smallest I've ever been.

Yet this is not my "norm," to my mind.

So I started doing the math in my head.

I am knocking on the door of a 40-pound weight reduction.

Yet at this new weight, I am 30 pounds heavier than I was when I got pregnant back in 1974.  At that time, I was seriously underweight.  Had been all my life to that point (I was 24 years old).

I only gained 17 pounds with my pregnancy.   My doctor at the time was a little disappointed that I hadn't gained extra weight, saying that he had hoped the pregnancy would be a perfect opportunity to add some permanent pounds to me.  It all came off.  My baby was tiny but the rest was fluid that left with her.

My medical file indicates that by 1980, I had gained 15 pounds.  

Sorry, my little chickadee, but your memory isn't serving you very well because you were nine years old before I hit the weight that I am today.  I'll grant you that by the time you were 12, I had hit the obese column.  But again in 1993 I was 20 pounds less than what I weigh today.  You should remember that year.

Seeing me today, at this weight, I don't think I would want to be much smaller than this.  I imagine that I would look emaciated if I lost more weight.  I do know that when I was all those lower weights, I was often asked if something was wrong.  Accused of being anorexic.  You get the picture.  I was skin and bones.

The BMI charts -- those dreaded charts that the health care community cling to so tightly as gospel -- indicate that someone of my height should range anywhere from 118 to 159 pounds.  That's a 40 pound spread!

I needed to lose the 40 pounds I lost.  No question.  My current BMI is 24.43 -- just under the overweight classification.  (A "normal weight BMI" is between 18.5 and 24.99.)

But I also recall a period when I was 20 pounds lighter than I am today (a BMI of 20.22), and my doctor was threatening to hospitalize me to force feed me.  I was that thin!

My massage therapist tells me that she can so readily feel my bones now, she would be quite concerned about me should I lose a significant amount more weight.  I would simply be too thin for my body frame.

All this to say that my new, smaller body is close to 30 pounds heavier than my pre-pregnant 24-year old self.  

Bonnie in the summer of 1974

Some say that skinny is sexy.
I for one don't ever want to be that thin again.
And I certainly don't ever want to have that hair again!

Missed my weight loss goal

BUT, there were extenuating circumstances.

On April 8th,  I went to my doctor and got cortisone shots in my knees.  She told me then that I had to take it easy for a week to let the cortisone do its work.  That meant no treadmill for a week!  Since I hadn't yet done the treadmill that morning, it meant I was missing four days of workout (to my goal date).

I'm not allowed back on the treadmill until April 15th.  Factor in the four days I missed, and my deadline jumps to April 18th.

So, I now have until Friday, April 18th to meet that elusive goal of 40 pounds.

Of course, the cortisone also caused a bump in weight.  Not a big one, mind you, but a bump no less.

So now I have 3.6 lbs to go instead of 2.8 lbs.

I must say though, I'm really enjoying this new "skinny" status.

I feel so good about my new look.

Yesterday, I wore a pair of pants that my daughter gave me a few years ago when I had shrunk after being quite ill.  Her cast-offs!  They didn't quite fit me then.  But they do now.  Like a glove!  And they are soooooo comfortable.

You've heard of "not my daughter's jeans?"

Well, I told my little chickadee that I would have to get a t-shirt that says "these ARE my daughter's jeans" or, more rightly, "these WERE my daughter's jeans."

Suffice to say, weight loss goal being met or not, I am very happy with the new me.

Fairly soon now, John is going to get quite tired of hearing me say, "Have I mentioned how much I love being skinny?"

It's good to be boring

So says my dermatologist.

John and I went for our annual once-over last Friday and we were both declared to be "boring."  As she explained, "That's good in this business."  Translation:  If nothing requires further attention, you are boring!  We'll see her again in another year, unless something of concern develops in the interim.  (She is again about to go off on maternity leave; her due date is May 18th.)

When we finished with her, I moved into the examination room next door to wait for her husband.  Time for my two-month check-up following my tummy tuck surgery.  "Boring," he said with a sly grin.  I am healing exactly as I should, everything is coming along right on schedule.  All is good.  I told him he was supposed to tell me I look fantastic, or amazing or something to that effect.  That's what everyone else tells me.  He said he has to stick to medical terminology.  Not allowed to tell me I look fantastic.  

He also gave me the "all systems go" as far as activity is concerned, explaining that I am "healed" although full recovery actually takes up to 18 months.  I admitted that if there were any restrictions on me, I have been violating them all.  Again a sly little grin.  (He's really quite cute!)

I received his clearance to receive cortisone shots in my knees.  So tomorrow when I see my family doctor, she will be giving me those injections.  Finally!  (She has refused to give me the shots until she had an "all clear" from my surgeon.)

By the end of the visit the surgeon allowed that I was "perfect," a designation I assured him I would be sharing with my husband!

I will see him again at the beginning of July when he will take my "after" pictures, and he agreed to give me copies of my before and after images.  Apparently, many patients ask for them.  That will also be our last visit, insofar as my tummy tuck surgery is concerned.

Turns out he also does eyelids so when my eye doctor says it's time for that repair to happen (a surgery that will be covered by OHIP), he will be happy to do that for me.  (I have what is called ptosis - a condition my eye doctor has been tracking for many years  Both eyes are affected, my right much more so than my left.  At some point in the not-too-distant future I will require surgical intervention.)  Now that I have this relationship with him, I would just as soon he do the work as start over with a new plastic surgeon.  I'm confident my eye doctor will have no objection to that approach.

Anyway, all in all, under the circumstances, I'm quite happy to be boring!

It's John's birthday again

Today John get's another year older.

But you'd never know it to look at him.

This is the photo that graces his web page, his Facebook  profile, and any other social media site to which he belongs.

He's looked like this since before I met him.

Obviously, he just doesn't age -- in spite of what the birthday numbers tell us. 

Happy birthday darling!

Love you.

My weight loss efforts

A year ago April 11th I embarked on my weight loss journey, initially setting no particular goal other than to get healthy.

Eight weeks later, I celebrated when I had lost ten pounds.  So proud of myself I was.

That's when I started setting goals.

In ten pound increments.

It took eleven weeks to drop the next ten pounds.  But by August 15th I was down a total of 20 pounds.  (I had wanted to hit that mark for my birthday on August 9th.)

The next ten pounds took even longer -- eighteen weeks to shed a mere ten pounds.  Not so proud of myself any longer but at least I was down a total of 30 pounds by Christmas!

This was taking way too long!

But I stuck to my regime anyway and started to make arrangements for that long-wanted tummy tuck.  That happened at the end of January of this year.

Then my weight loss stalled.

Totally.

Wouldn't budge an ounce.

Of course there was a lot of swelling with the surgery and once everything settled down I was only smaller by the four pounds that the surgeon had removed.

Now, with only eight more days to go until the one year mark since I started this journey, I still have 3.4 pounds to lose.  With that, I will hit the 40 pound weight loss goal that I some time ago decided would be a nice round number to achieve. 

Another tummy tuck would just about do it.  Of course I jest.

I'll let you know when I reach this newest, and final, goal.   If I reach it by April 15th, it will have taken me another 17 weeks to lose the last ten pounds.

Then, my challenge will be to maintain my new weight.  And that my friends, will be a real challenge for me because I am eating all I want to eat.  And I'm eating healthily.  So how do I continue doing that and not continue losing weight?  I also certainly won't want to gain weight.

Balance, balance, balance ...

World Autism Awareness Day

Today, April 2nd, is World Autism Awareness day.
A day set aside to help promote awareness of and raise funds for research into the disorder.
Wear blue today to show your support for the initiative.

More importantly, give where and when you can.
Help promote awareness.
Help support research.
The more we learn about the disorder, the more we can help those who are living with it.